November 15, 2021•502 words
I maybe shouldn't feel compelled to write every day but I did start this blog with the intention of writing daily for #100Days. I did have an idea for a post earlier today but I distracted myself down multiple rabbit-holes until now. I procrastinated. It deserves a little more effort, so instead I will just give a little update about this website and my life? And honestly the trading posts probably shouldn't count or maybe I shouldn't congest this blog with them. They could be on another page or perhaps Listed will implement categories. I am happy with - for once - in my other posts thus-far.
Deciding on a custom domain name for this blog and site, and exploring what I might be able to do within StandardNotes/Listed and with external extensions and customization. Nothing fancy for the name, just picking some fun and inexpensive TLD like .love or .xyz or .star (actually this one is private and cannot be registered... lavitz.star would've been perfect!).
An update about my life? Stumbling and faltering along my quest to uproot negative habits and dependencies, but picking myself up and enduring. Habits take time to undo or create, so I forgive myself as it's only natural. Establishing a consistent routine in the absence of one is a process; my plan includes meditating and exercising first thing in the morning as to not give myself the chance to not do them later in the day, delaying eating until I should or am absolutely hungry, deflecting the urge to play video games into writing or creating (but still allowing myself some fun sometimes), taking time away from trading and charting to read books, flossing daily again, resisting the draw to alcohol or other drugs to "relax", and more. I know I shouldn't try to do everything at once - I've failed at this many times - but I seem to be doing pretty great this time around. I definitely could benefit from an extended dopamine detox. Slowly but surely channeling the energy, urge and restlessness to consume/play video games (as a life-long "addict") into projects, exercise and archery, or into meditation and focusing on existing in the present moment so that I can hopefully reduce my hyperactivity and dopamine crave. I not only have finally distanced myself from my hardcore World of Warcraft guild of over two years (after playing the game since 2004), but I also recently withdrew from a potential love-interest out of respect for her and myself. I've been doing everything in the world except clean my room and respond to family & friends, so let me first cross those chasms.
"So I kept traveling, kept it ongoing
I kept babbling as I kept unraveling this long hole I'm in
And there's no way to dig out, get out of my way
There's no thing that the kid can live out of any day
So let's play with the video games and
the individual pain that paints the paint in your brain" -Eyedea (freestyle, Duluth is Truth)